KG's Kicka$$ Keepers: The FattyPack

NO LARRY, dear God… not sometimes! You think we sometimes come across a product that makes us go, “well how the F&*K am I supposed to use this thing, Kathy?!” or “Bob, does it need batteries or something, ‘cause I don’t have triple A’s on me!” We come across a product like this all the time, and it brings us the purest form of joy to get a sample, sit down (with coffee... or tequila), and figure it out FOR you…yes, YOU reading this very blog! When you have a me (KG) around, I will always do the boots-on-the-ground investigation of whether a product is worth your time or not. And let me tell you this—KG’s Kicka$$ Keeper is (again) a product you don’t know you needed until you needed it! Let me introduce you to—The FattyPack! 

I am just going to get right down to the nitty gritty and the elephant in the swag room: everyone’s hands are ALWAYS full. Phones, drinks, badges, baggage, stress, shoes, socks, keys, oh-no-where’d-my-wallet-go…etc. FattyPack is a tiny but mighty storage unit that lives where no pouch has dared to live before—on the back of your hat (or bag strap, water bottle handle, backpack…you get the point). In the simplest terms, it wraps on and blends in, holding your essentials so you don’t have to dig, fuss, or worry! This isn’t the fanny pack revival…no Larry (who even is Larry, to be honest—we don’t know, but let’s keep it going). This is a plot twist before your very eyes, so hop in and buckle up. 

The FattyPack has range, baby! Yes, it does! Hat-free for the day? Cool, we got it. Strap it to a bra, bikini, backpack, purse, or anything else your beautiful brain can conjure up…you’re good at creating fake scenarios—we have witnessed that overthinking brain; this is a walk in the park for you. GET CREATIVE. Start to think, “hmmm…where else could I use a little extra sneaky storage without screaming, ‘I am carrying a bunch of things right now.’”  

Inside, there is room for cash, meds, first aid, SD cards, or other small-but-critical items. On the tether? Keys or a bottle opener, because life is unpredictable and also a balancing act! Then you can wrap or slide in pens, golf tees, or glasses. It’s discreet, flexible, and wildly more useful than the 47th branded koozie someone already owns. 

Now let’s talk movement, because some of you actually leave the house on purpose. Walkers, runners, hikers, golfers, dog parents, airport sprinters, casual “I’ll just go around the block” liars—FattyPack thrives here. When you’re on a walk or run, the last thing you want is pockets pulling your shorts down or keys doing that aggressive jingle-jangle soundtrack. Clip it to your hat, strap, or bag and suddenly your phone, keys, ID, or emergency snack are secured without bouncing, flopping, or announcing themselves to the neighborhood. On hikes? It’s clutch for meds, cash, first aid, or those tiny essentials you always swear you won’t need… until you absolutely do. It keeps your hands free, your vibe intact, and your focus where it belongs—on not tripping over a root and becoming a trail legend for the wrong reason. 👀

The FattyPack

Starting at $14.10

From events to swag stores to internal gifts and mailers, FattyPack is that rare promo item that generates curiosity and unexpected-ness. It’s lightweight, easily shippable, wearable, and just odd enough to be memorable in the best way. So…GO GLEN COCO LARRY GO, be the brand that brings the weird little genius item that actually gets used, talked about, and mysteriously never ends up in the junk drawer. FattyPack isn’t just swag… it’s a “wait—why don’t I already own this?” moment wearing your logo.  

Interested in the FattyPack? Let's Chat!